Wherefore art thou, Narumi, if you weren’t doing art?
I don’t think many kids thought math was fun and i wasn’t the exception. Since i was small, all i did was art. As I’ve grown up, i still do art. But now i’m at a point where i need to choose my destiny. My one Pokemon companion that will help me lead to different adventures. (I’m talking about my degree course)
My relationship with art has been consistent; i simply find creating fun
But im a polygamist, I can’t stick to one subject or i’ll feel restricted and trapped.
The longest ever relationship i had was with fashion. Since GCE days until i graduated, i’ve managed to stay interested in fashion. It was a fast burning passion like the other but because of social pressure and comfort, i stayed within my fashion realm.
In my last year of A levels, I had an art teacher. He was full of art history wisdom but non for modern fashion. He didn’t really seemed to care about art outside his interest and i just felt unmotivated every time i came to class. Then i developed a love- hate relation ship with fashion as it felt more like a chore.
I’ve applied for a fashion degree, thinking that’s what i should be doing but last minute ( literally like 3 months before course starts) I’ve changed my mind and said goodbye to my old lover. When you’re love life isn’t fun anymore, you’ve got to change it up.
Now i have met with all kinds of art, allowing me to experience things I’ve never before. It has been really fun. Little by little, I found out subjects that i don’t like, crossing off the list of courses i can take.
So far things i don’t see myself doing;
- Oil painting and acrylics
Of course, i wont limit myself to never doing these things but i know i wouldn’t want to further educate myself about these things for 3~4 years.
But i went to the vulgar museum. I went in unsuspected but my old flame stood waiting for me. We chatted, we were nostalgic and I rekindle with my old flame, however I still have doubts to if that is what i want.
What am i looking for? I’m not sure but i feel as though i haven’t found it yet.
I know now to not deny my liking for fashion and just because i chose one course, i haven’t limit my life to one thing. I’m still discovering myself and probably will be for the rest of my life. I just have to take in the fact that its not as easy as choosing a pokemon and its alright to change my mind mid-course.
Hopefully by the end of my experimentation phase (foundation course) I will have clearer vision to what i want to do but for now, i think its best to allow myself to try everything and let myself be drawn to whatever. Besides, I don’t think i will have the same luxury to do this in the future.